Oh... Heh... Finally.
Here, carry it yourself.
Do you hear what I’m saying to you? I say, carry it yourself.
Who do you think I am? And thank Vytautas The Great.
Thank you, Mr. Vytautas The Great.
Listen, cut the bullshit. Just cut it.
Listen... Next time I will lock him up for a few
days, and this will be your problem, God dammit.
I know, I know... That’s it, this is the last time.
How should I put it back on the wall?
Do it as you like... Use your dick if you want.
Heh, little bastard... Ok, bye.
Bye.
Gabija, I need dills!
Gabija!
Algis, where is mom?
She left for some sticks.
Here we go, she finally came, and now she left for sticks.
Come to me, Krumplius! Sit down! Lie down!
Oh... good day, my dear friend.
Yes, Per Günther.
Hi Algis, what name you gave to the puppy today?
I don’t remember.
Very nice name.
- Flatfish? - Yes.
- With butter? - Of course.
- With caraway? - No. With lemon.
Excellent!
Beer?
You see... I’m driving.
Do as you like. I’ll bring the money tomorrow.
Gabija has left with the entire bank.
There she is. Bank is coming back.
Bravo!
And the sun was taken by the woods...
No problem, we’ll have dinner on a grass.
- Hello, Žilvinas. - Hi.
So how are you? Have you found a wife already?
Maybe you would like to have dinner with us?
I don‘t know... I’m driving.
You do not know if you’re driving?
Yes.
Maybe you could drive to a kitchen for a corkscrew?
Yes, yes.... I love alcohol.
No less than 8, no less than 8...
- What? - Buy us some smokes?
Danutė, you will you give it for free?
Then it is goodbye...
apparently shit happened. Nicely said.
Goodbye.
Did they beat you hard?
It was ok. Hi, Danutė.
What did Vytautas The Great tell you?
He said “Bad boy”. I am borrowing this for 1 hour. See you.
Hey, nerd. Can you give me 3 litas? This is for church roof repair.
This is all I have.
Hey, there is also a lottery ticket.
Still valid.
Need any help?
Forget it.
Well, if you don’t want... do as you like.
Where’s my beer?
In the bank.
Listen, Žilvinas.
We have new notary, transferred here.
- Stop it... - She likes to fish.
- I said stop it... - Simple, nice girl. Really.
Loves nature. Cute, with glasses.
I don’t know...
Why aren’t you picking up?
No one’s at home.
Bottoms up and goodnight!
Goodnight, Žilvinas.
Yes...
And listen... give me the keys.
What keys?
Apparently not from the apartment.
I’ll give it back to you in the morning.
I’ll have breakfast naked on the grass and drink coffee.
Probably I’ll take my clothes off as well.
- Maybe it’s really goodnight... - Come on over, it’ll be nice.
- Will you come? - Will you?
Fancy any dessert?
I’d really love to.
Algis, go back to bed! And take off your helmet.
Phone of Gintaras at your service.
Hi, Saulius. One moment.
Huh, you see, out of breath...
Was very busy, could not pick up.
Germans occupied, doing all that I can to feed them.
Have you heard? Gabija is here. With Algis.
What?
No, no.
This will not work. Next time.
You can be angry, do as you want.
Goodnight.
What happened?
Saulius’s kid basically lives at the police station.
Asked if he could to stay here.
If I could find him some job...
I am not a nanny! It’s his problem and he has to deal with it.
But he is your brother.
When he needs something, then he is a brother.
But when I need something, then he is a cousin at best.
Forget him once and for all.
Do as you want.
Just don't brag later.
I had to do one way, but did another.
You know better...
Listen, where are we going?
To Rietavas.
- Why to Rietavas? - To buy orange car!
Well said and great idea! Let’s drink for your orange idea!
Bus to Rokiškis, Južintai, Zarasai leaves from isle 6.
Listen, Rokas. When you arrive...
Hi, Saulius. How are the things about that land?
Tomorrow, ok... tomorrow.
What was I talking about...? Oh, when you arrive, call me. Really call me.
Hi, Saulius.
Later, Tadas. While you say hi to everyone, bus will reach Nida.
Where do you buy tickets? In ticket office or...?
In ticket office.
Ok, in ticket office it is.
Or you can buy it on the bus.
Why didn’t you tell this in the first place?
- Can you do this faster? - I can’t. Give me one ticket...
For God’s sake, he can buy the ticket himself!
Give me a kiss. And be a good boy.
Bus Rokiškis – Nida leaves from isle 3.
Listen, Rokas’s bus will arrive at 9:30.
We just got him onto bus. I see it leaving...
Ok, call me in case of something. Bye.
Now it’s really fucking dead. Get out.
Why do you need this piece of shit when you have such money?
Drop it. Let’s go to hitch a ride.
What is this?
Hi, guys.
Do I need to prepare for beating?
Hey, hey...
Stop, stop!
Went to Rietavas.
Shit, shit... from head to toes.
Shitty shit with more shit!
Mother is calling.
Hello.
At Mantulis.
Call the police.
Shit happened here.
I am going home.
What is this place?
You are going nowhere. Stay with Rodman.
We will meet in Rietavas.
- When? - We meet when we meet.
Stop, stop now. There’s a naked guy there.
Where are you going, handsome?
Anywhere. Maybe you could untie me?
What is your name?
Rokas.
Nice, he is Rokas.
- Where are you from? - From Rokiškis.
- From where? - From Rokiškis.
Rokas from Rokiškis!
One, two, three...
Where is that car market?
Maybe somewhere close to church?
Where have you seen car market close to church?
It has to be somewhere...
Wait here, I will go ask for directions.
Asshole.
Go, ask him.
Ask him, I am telling you.
Guys!
This is yours?
Nice chick.
Yes, this is our Janis Joplin.
- And you are? - I am Robert Plant.
Robert Not Plant. This is what you are.
Giedrius, stop at gas station. We need beer.
Uncle Rokas, help young talent. Buy me so drinks.
Do you have an ID?
Here kids, buy some chips.
Wow... gas station, beer!
I am telling you, I am 100% sure they go straight to the finals.
Come on, what finals... they cannot reach even semi-finals.
They play only in defense, nothing in the front.
They are just waiting for penalties. I am telling you...
Hello. What?
The bus.
Come here, come to me.
- Žilvinas, pay for me. - Are you kidding me?
Why Žilvinas?
If I forgot my wallet, means Žilvinas.
- How much does he owns? - Forget it.
Come here, come here.
Fuck!
Krumplius is all right, look. Nothing happened to him.
I stopped to tie my shoe.
And here it is...
From nowhere. 2000 litas up to my ass.
Maybe someone saw license plates?
Yes, white plate with black letters and numbers.
Gintaras, maybe call Žiufas.
Let’s go.
Hi, this is Gintaras...
Didn’t wake you up?
Listen, put the spoon away, take your gear and come here.
Some asshole started drag races around the town.
Good morning everyone.
Wow... Not bad.
Why are you so happy?
I want beer.
Then I should be happy all day.
Large beer, please.
Fuck, fuck!
Such a bike it was...
Fucking Wild West.
One more whiskey!
Stop pitying yourself about all the things.
No one can force you to feel this way, only you.
Give me whiskey!
What are you talking here about?
Never underestimate power of positive thinking, especially when you have
such a superb helmet. Useful when you are coming back from the bar.
Where can I find bathroom?
Should we wait?
Not necessary, but would be nice. I will just have one more pint.
Then just take of my shoes, for easier running, and quickly straight to home.
Hey, that was offside. That guy just stands there with his flag
and tiny legs and does not know what to do.
So where is your nephew?
Didn’t come.
Or maybe he came, but I did not recognize him.
I haven’t seen him for 15 years.
15 years.
One guy came from the bus...
I thought that is him. Or maybe not...
Hey fat man, this is my place.
What?
I am saying this is my place. This is my beer and myself.
So what?
Old man, take dirt from your ears.
I am saying this is my place; this is my beer and myself.
My beer, my place and myself.
Beer, place, I.
Want more?
- I am asking, want more? - Thank you, it is enough.
It says, Daddy.
Listen bro...
I don’t know who you are, but that does not matter.
I see that you are not very good in making kids.
Maybe don't make anymore?
Yes, my dear brother; that was a joke. You know my humor, not always perfect.
Yes, he came. Safe and sound. We are just planning to have dinner.
Talk to your daddy.
Good morning.
Not good.
Why?
Because you stink!
Gabija.
Thank you.
Shower is over there.
Nice.
Shit, good morning.
Wake up!
So, where are we going?
To fuck!
Wow!
Go!
Come here.
Sit.
Nice dog you have here. What is his name?
Today? Haven’t thought about it yet.
Ant what name was yesterday?
Yesterday? Ruble.
What a nice name.
I mean, yesterday's name.
And what is dog’s breed?
Iron.
Do you have a dad?
Yes, I have.
- And you? - No.
So Gintaras is not your...?
Gintaras is my best friend.
Good morning everyone.
Pick up and take this to smokehouse.
Maybe let him have breakfast at least?
What breakfast? Boss says, breakfast only in evening.
- I will show him around. - Yes, show him everything.
What a nice view...
Nice lines, nice clothing.
What are your plans for today?
We will go the market, and then we will play... artists.
Male to the left, female to the right.
What about you?
I will go visit Columbus, have some business.
Thread all the breams and put them on the left and flatfishes on the right.
Going to get the papers.
Rokas, do you have anything in your pockets?
No.
You should check them.
Ok, I showed him something, I forgot something...
You see, we could wash away all your money.
...he will learn somehow.
Žilvinas, that notary is waiting for you.
Stop it, Gintaras, stop it.
There’s not much money.
I invested it all yesterday.
Wasted it, to be precise. Whatever.
Stop, stop, stop.
Breaks do not work.
I see that.
- Good day. - Yes, my Fuhrer.
Do you have a driver’s license?
If it is in my wallet then yes, if in my backpack – then no.
Let’s go.
What about fish?
Fish is in the box, it won’t go anywhere.
So tell me, what a mess you made up there?
Tell me.
Let’s say I was not very nice couple of times.
What is that “let’s say” and what is “was not very nice couple of times”?
“Let’s say” because it’s not totally true, and
“not very nice” depends from where you look.
For someone it is not very nice, for someone pretty nice. I see it very nice,
but others say that it is not very nice. This is my philosophy.
Who are these “others”?
My parents. And Vytautas The Great.
God dammit...
Good day.
Oh, Mr. Gintaras.
Hi, Andriukas.
Yes, I am listening.
You passed “no traffic” sign, Mr. Gintaras. What will we do here?
What will we do? Turn on rear gear and leave the scene of the accident.
How is you mother?
Give all the best to your father.
Get out from here.
Good morning all the listeners of “Radiocentras”.
What’s your mood, Ernestas?
Vytenis, it is 9 of 10, but if I was in Nida, I would give full 10.
What about you?
It is 10, but if I were next to the seaside, it would be 10 and a half.
Nephew.
- Rokas. - Kristupas.
Columbus.
- Not much. - What do you mean “not much”?
Not much to nickname a person Columbus, when his real name is Kristupas.
You see, you think you know fucking everything, you little bastard.
Well, he is right, you know.
Then we all are bastards.
Not we, but...
Ok, I need your autograph.
Tea or coffee?
Lemonade for me...
And real lemonade for him as he’s driving.
What do we have here?
What do we have here? You see...
I thought we are settled for May.
Do you know why I thought we are settled for May?
Give me these papers, I will put my signature and get out of here.
There will be strong regatta this year.
Swedes, Dutch are coming.
Skirmantas went to the States.
So I am thinking, maybe... mm?
I need your signature here as well.
You don't agree?
Rokas!
Take your pen.
- Let’s go. - Home?
I don’t think so.
So, Juratė, what is our main hotel rule?
No problems.
And for the close ones?
Then, call us in two weeks.
Right.
- Good day. - Hi.
We need your best apartments.
But without breakfast and dinner.
Hello, have you made your reservation in advance?
We are making reservations right now, online.
All rooms are already reserved.
- Goodbye. - Goodbye.
Tadas, please do not go away.
What about them? We can take their room.
Sorry, but this room is also reserved.
Room for Martynas.
- Hello. - Hello.
Yes, your room is #9. Here you go.
Thank you. Who owns this crap that stands on the sidewalk?
Whose crap is on the sidewalk, mm?
Maybe it is your crap there? Maybe it is yours? Or maybe it is yours?
Listen, fire extinguisher. Collect your fag friends and get out from here.
Fag friends? Have you heard how he called you?
Please leave this place.
- What are you bragging here, asshole? - Asshole?
Nice to meet you, Rodman.
Listen, little fuck, I see that you got your ass kicked long time ago.
Yes, long time ago, three times a day.
I repeat, please leave the place or I am calling the security.
One moment, one moment.
- I am calling the security. - Shut up, you maid.
Hey, listen you butt fuck,
is this how you talk to a lady?
Are you talking to me?
I am getting tired of this asshole.
Hey, don’t be such a drama queen.
- Awesome holidays! - Really awesome
- 3000? - Yes, 3000.
And around 280 kilos of bananas. You see, I am vegan.
Why didn’t you insure it?
Well, probably I was stupid.
Hello everyone.
Good morning, large pint, as always.
What are we talking about?
This man went on a trip around the world with his bicycle,
but he did not insure his bicycle.
Who would give insurance for the bicycle?
Insurance company, who else.
Really, do they give insurance for skates as well?
What are you talking about?
There are advanced bicycles,
which cost like 5 off-road cars.
Only stupid person would not insure such thing.
Ok stupid, cheers for your trip.
Look, look, look... Rokas!? Rokas!
- Look at that! - How are you?
- Hi. - What are you doing here in Nida?
I do not know myself what I am doing here.
- Really? - Driving my uncle around.
- What uncle? - My uncle.
You look like a clown.
If you had insurance for your bicycle, you would get 2000 for this accident.
Yes, you could buy a new bicycle.
Listen, do you go to church?
Yes, last time I was there...
So it is simple, we can get your money back in no time.
Ok, where did you start from?
From Nida, from Kernagis statue.
How do you like out new car?
And we live in 25 square meters apartments.
Not 25 square meters, 25 stars!
- Driving around. - Rokas, let’s go.
You see, we have some money now.
Listen, how many have you already spent?
Come on, we just came here today. Let’s talk tomorrow.
Good afternoon, my fair lady.
How are you doing today?
I am asking, how are you today?
I feel a little tension.
Gabija, what’s wrong?
You have already showed all your talents? To your student.
How to steal a car, how to drink barrel of beer.
Our hero, uncle Gintaras.
Our youth needs to learn!
You could stick a feather up into your ass and dance Swan Lake for him.
Goodnight.
Fuck off...
- Where do I sleep? - Sleep wherever you want.
Oh shit!
Come here.
Can you tell me, what is this?
I don’t know, maybe flatfish.
Fucking flatfish!
This is a very expensive bream.
Some time ago it was a very expensive bream.
Now you can stick it up into your ass.
Possibly it is useful to poison Germans only.
What did Žilvinas tell you?
- You know what, uncle Gintaras? - I am listening very carefully.
Fuck you.
This feels like something personal,
very close.
Listen, here it is. One moment.
Swan Lake...
Krumplius...
Here we are, left all alone.
In Sahara desert, without beer.
I don’t care, but you are socialist.
You are dead without socializing.
It is not right to leave friends alone.
Gintaras.
What?
- Where is the sponge? - I put it under the sink.
Why do you need it?
Audrius came, he wants to wash the yacht.
Hello Audrius.
Hi.
Yesterday I washed with that sponge, put it here somewhere.
But now it is gone.
You will cook this with butter and dill?
No, I will stew it in kefir.
I have read very interesting recipe
in “Sailing for dummies” book written by Patašius.
I found it.
- Where it was? - I don’t remember.
Great job.
Clean your shitty hands.
Pick out these small ones and put it in the drawer.
We will paint their shells in the spring.
It will be very nice decoration for Easter.
How are you parents?
Well, they say they are ok.
Why “they say”?
You know, after the drowning, haven’t seen them.
People say they moved to Zarasai.
Father entered aviation school.
And mother like always, selling acorns.
- Acorns? - Acorns.
Interesting.
Hello father.
Why not in Zarasai? Finished your studies?
Having practice for summer.
Aviation ticket’s control and management.
I have two. Will you join?
Why not.
You are not allowed.
Fucking sponge.
Guys, we will have a short brake, need to change a string. We’ll be back in a moment.
Hello. Great job guys!
- Hey, Rokas from Rokiškis. - Hi.
Hi!
You look good.
Yeah, everyone says that to me.
Maybe, by accident you saw my backpack in your camper?
Yes, we saw. That was yours?
Come to the camping site after the concert.
What?
Hello.
Why is your phone turned off or outside service area?
Why don’t you pick up your phone? I am asking you!
Hey, angry friend. You are blocking the view.
Keep your fucking hands off me!
When you have uncontrollable need to get into
the fight for who is right, who is not, always
think very carefully, what is better for you – to be right or to be happy?
Wayne Dyer.
Who's that?
Clown, where are you from?
From Rokiškis.
And I am not clown, I am Rokas.
Rokas from Rokiškis. And with whom do I have pleasure meeting with?
Ok, guys, I am ready, we can start.
This is Martynas, let’s say – a lawyer.
I think a prosecutor, Vilnius university or Romeris university?
A secret?
Hey asshole, I think you want your ass kicked.
- Thank you. - Always welcome, ladies.
Hey, let these people live.
- How is the concert? - Not bad, I’ve seen worse.
Where are you from?
- What from where? - I mean where do you live?
Look at her.
Koala. Stands here calmly, chewing eucalyptus.
So here it is, you can conquer the world by not doing anything.
Where are you from?
We are from the apartments!
He means we have apartments, with a view, breakfast...
I am asking, where have you come from?
Guess.
You try and try...
...but shit happens.
Laozi.
- Maybe from London? - Ok, we are from Rokiškis.
In Rokiškis it is sometimes better than in London.
So girls, what do you want to listen to?
It is on us.
- What? - Everything.
- What? - I knew it - Romeris University.
Fucking asshole.
Not me, it is for you to decide, which one of you is a fucking asshole.
Look, it is Rokas.
Please wait, girls; it will be better than London. Just do not run away.
Fucking Rokas from Rokiškis. Asshole.
Dudes from Rokiškis are dedicating this ballad to these two charming ladies.
Does it hurt?
You know, that was really cool.
- But... - But what?
But now it could be not cool.
I am serious.
You know him?
Yeah.
- Your boyfriend? - No, I got tired of him.
- Good. - Let's go.
Let’s go.
One moment.
- Here you go. - Thank you.
So... see you.
Yes, see you.
- Where are you heading? - Home.
Good luck.
Maybe you want some tea before you leave?
Maybe.
I fell in love.
What took you so long?
Where is your mother?
I don’t know.
Where is Rokas?
In outer space.
Oh, good afternoon.
Hi. Algis, let’s go.
Listen, I think Krumplius wants to stay at home.
And I think he does not.
Algis, listen.
Either you tie Krumplius to a tree or take him in your hands. You choose.
Sit down, please.
Pig.
Not exactly.
- Piglet. - Yes.
- Not ashamed? - For what?
For some things I am ashamed, for some – not.
Vatican radio on air?
Live broadcast from heaven.
- Who is winning? - Everyone.
Today, at the gates, St. Peter allows everyone to pass.
- What? - What, what... notary.
We bought a new sound system, Dolby surround sound.
They instaled it and told me that my voice will sound like it is
coming from heaven, but now, once we turned it on...
Which one buzzes? This one or that one?
I don’t know.
If it is Dolby surround so probably both.
- Stop it, Gintaras. - Stop what?
You see, they set it up, left. And now it buzzes. Can you fix it?
I will take a look.
- I am going to check. - Check, check. From the front.
My beloved woman, please pay attention to second word in a sentence.
This is not some random mess from eight syllables.
I continue.
During my life path...
Stop posing, Gintaras. What will you do with Rokas?
Where is Rokas?
One, one... one, two, three... God be with you.
And with your soul.
This is only rehearsal, I am sorry. What I wanted to say...?
Oh yes, I would like to thank this dear brother. What is your name?
Šarūnas Sveikata.
- And last name? - What?
- What is your last name? - Sveikata.
Šarūnas Sveikata.
We thank dear brother Šarūnas Sveikata for helping our church.
It does not matter now how he was raised.
Now you are responsible for him. I am responsible for him. And that’s it.
And do not stick in these stinky fishes.
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Please God, please keep me alive,
let there be no heart attack or some other nonsense.
I promise, I will not drink anymore.
Will not drink so... so much.
During my life path...
In short...
Very nice, where did you get it?
Found it under the bed. What do you say?
I am thinking.
Will it take long?
When I finish thinking, I will give you a sign.
If I'd speak in the tongues of men or of angels...
but would not have love...
...I would only be a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I had the gift of prophecy
and could fathom all mysteries and all knowledge...
...and if I had faith that could move mountains...
...but would not had love...
...I would be nothing.
If I'd give all I possess to the poor...
If I'd give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but wouldn't have love...
...I'd gain nothing.
But please let me be naughty a little more,
until I get back to Rokiškis.
And then I will quit, I swear to God, I will quit.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy...
Thank you.
It always protects...
...always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. Amen. That was the word of God.
Thank you, God.
So girls, let’s go shopping!
Go fucking.
What?
Let’s talk one on one, now!
What do you think about the money?
There’s a lot of them.
They are coming!
Ok, so let’s have a smoke and we will go shopping.
Tiny?
- What is going on here? - This is revenge.
What revenge?
Because you left me outside at night.
Open the door!
Open!
Open now or we will cut your dick into small coins.
- Are you planning to visit Klaipėda? - Yes, tomorrow.
Go to art store, take some oil paint, all colors. Four tubes for each color.
Also some polish and some primed carton.
May God’s peace be with you always.
And with you, too.
Let’s wish everyone peace.
Peace.
Peace and take some paintbrushes - round, flat, various sizes.
When we leave the church, I will give you money.
One moment please, stop... How should I present all this now?
It is very simple.
Our brother, Šarūnas Sveikata. Come here, Šarūnas.
He travels around the world, spreading the word about Lithuania.
In his journey he rides a very expensive bicycle. Which...
Which broke down.
So he needs a new bike, please support him.
I really do not recommend visiting that bar we all know,
but at that bar there is...
Help and support committee.
Thank you, you name will be written into history
of Lithuania bicycles.
Congratulations.
Good day. Thank you.
Oh, maybe you could give me less?
- No, take it. - Take it. 50.
Hi, Jonas. Dry Martini with ice.
Hi, for me as always.
Give some kvass for this little man, and I will have some juice.
- What? - Your name?
- Giedrė. - Giedrė, so nice.
Thank you.
Morkevičienė.
- Also not bad. - Juice?
Juice, juice.
Goodbye.
Juice or "juice"?
Jonas, what’s wrong? It is so hot, I want to drink.
Thank you.
What have you gave me here? I asked for juice.
Juice it is.
Love birds?
Justė, come on.
Stop your love breakfast. Let’s go to rehearse.
Their ears are shut, they cannot hear you.
What?
Nothing.
Get out of here.
What does he want from you?
What, what. It is obvious what he wants.
Let me fix everything.
No, stop. Stay here. Do you want your head to be fixed in a hospital?
These are my problems. And I will solve them myself.
You have no idea what kind of creature he is.
Thanks God.
A guy from North Yorkshire rode 18 000 miles in 91 days!
How many it would be in kilometers?
Approximately 29.
Can you imagine? He broke world record...
- Does he have a dog? - Have what?
A dog.
Of course he has.
He is from North Yorkshire. Think about it.
Espresso.
Why so easy today?
Have some work to do.
Every participant had to go 18 000 miles heading north.
I have decided. I will participate in regatta.
Not enough time.
Maybe enough, maybe not.
If you’d join, it would definitely be enough.
You know when I will join?
When Christmas will be moved to July 25th.
So you will soak here?
Yes, in orange juice.
I was told it is healthy.
Once I will finish rehearsing with the guys, I will call you? Ok?
By the way, I saw your nephew.
What? Where?
I told you he would not go anywhere.
Have you talked?
He came to me, at the workshop. Got stiff.
Looked at one point for a long time.
Said “I fell in love” and left.
My heart started missing a beat.
Then I thought maybe he’s talking about the yacht.
Strange guy.
The same bumper, the same.
Žiufas, it’s me.
That car I was telling you about just passed.
Write down the license plate number. It is very easy to remember, GOD.
I know what that means.
What?
So what that it is Museikis?
Who is he?
Thank you, officer. Thank you.
Son of some very important dickhead from Vilnius.
We did not see anything, we did not hear anything, as always.
I saw.
And heard.
Very clearly.
So, asshole. You came?
Sail to sea?
Yes, when I learn how.
I want to work here.
- Ok, but you know, I don’t have... - For food.
Make some coffee.
Tomas, Vidmantas... Who are you – Museikis?
Who are you?
Rokas, come here.
Touch it with your hand.
Not with the fingers, with your palm. Do you feel that?
You should not feel anything. It should be gentle as baby’s butt.
Later, when you come back, do all this again.
But this does not come off.
Because you are doing it wrong. Patience here is most important thing.
Why were you kicked out?
This is Gintaras, from Nida.
No, not from the museum.
Thank God, I am not turning to amber.
Straight to business.
Maybe you could find out who is fucking Museikis?
First name Alfonsas. Why he is so big in Lithuania?
Point is that I wasted tons of my father’s money.
He got me into university. To economics, business management, finance...
Father thinks that if he is making coins, so I should do the same.
Anyway...
And what do you like to do?
Arts, music, books, philosophy.
At the end, freedom.
So there it is.
First year I was pretending to study. Next year – partying at bars, clubs.
As Laozi once said – I was acting by not acting.
Meaning?
Let me quote.
God dammit, it stuck.
Here it is. Act by not acting, do without doing, taste the tasteless.
Large one is born from the tiny, plenty from empty.
From those, who give easy promises, there are very few who keep their word.
Things that looked very easy for them became very complicated later.
Listen, I think that Laozi guy mixed up something here.
If you rub this without rubbing,
if you polish it by quoting, we will not finish this
yacht before second appearance of Jesus Christ.
So drop this book and...
Wait, wait... I noticed something interesting here.
Oh yes, here it is... Things that looked very easy for them
became very complicated later.
When we sail to the sea, you can read your Laozi then.
If you still have desire for that.
Now grab abrasive paper and continue polishing.
I don’t want to see another time wasting at the clubs.
Laozi...
Hand me cross screwdriver.
What is that jib? I forgot.
A sail.
There is genoa, jib and main sail.
Main sail is main sail. Jib, second sail, located in the front of a yacht.
Jib’s top corner is attached to top of the mast.
Bottom corner – at the front of the ship.
Third corner is tightened with sheet.
Genoa is almost the same as...
Why am I telling you all this?
Let’s go.
Audrius, is that you?
Will we go?
No, Gintaras.
It is time for you to go back.
Are you all right?
- Listen. - I am listening.
One thing.
Can I rub your tits?
Scram douchebag.
- Hi, Liepa. - Hello.
How are your holidays?
It is ok, not boring.
Really? What are these imbeciles that are you hanging around with?
Have no idea. Normal guys, a little bit crazy.
They say they are from Rokiškis, but I think they are from England.
They brought a full bag of money.
Now wasting it to the left and right.
Really?
Why don’t you want to earn money at Gintaras?
It is not that I don’t want to.
Maybe he does not want me more.
Just...
Just what? Stop moaning. Speak clearly.
I don’t know. It looks like he has been hit by a paddle.
Always not happy. Always complaining.
He does not know what he wants.
He does not know? It is you who do not know.
Gintaras knows everything he needs to know. Believe me.
Give me beer from the freezer. Also there is a piece rubbed in a paper.
This is your fee.
Thank you.
How long do you know Gintaras?
Enough.
And you, as I see, met him only recently.
Gintaras is like this only now.
You see...
Few years ago, during training, his best student Audrius died.
Trials, cases...
Other shit.
Pity.
We have passed Cape Horn together with him.
- Meaning? - Literally.
Passed Cape Horn. And Cape Horn is...
So Gintaras is not some depressed old man from the village.
He is the best in Lithuania.
Was.
And he can salt fish like no one else, even not your Laozi.
Justė.
Ok, ok. Here, I will smoke by not smoking,
taste the tasteless and we will sail back.
What is this?
I don’t know yet.
Kristupas called. Rokas is at his place.
He said they are having a good chat.
Will you go together?
- Maybe you should go alone. - I will go.
What will you want for dinner?
If Rokas comes back... Quickly to the car!
If Rokas comes back, I will make Morocco chicken stew.
- What an idiot. - The same.
Why we stopped?
Just be calm, Algis, do not get stressed.
We are observing everything.
- Who is that kid looking there at us? - Where?
It just gets better and better.
- You know those two? - No, not really.
Well I know them a little.
What is your name?
Tiny. Mindaugas.
Hi, I am Mindaugas.
Stop, stop! Get out, fast!
Want some sugar?
I don’t, but Krumplius wants.
Go, go, go!
Take your kid and get out of here!
You stay and watch the car.
We can follow them.
We really can.
Bitch!
Fucked by the villagers.
We will have guests.
Hi, guys.
No.
What?
Congratulations. Impressive.
I am stunned.
Need a lift?
No, I will go to buy some ice cream.
You earned it.
Algis, let’s go, let’s go.
Don’t get up, don’t get up.
Knock, knock, knock.
Come in! I am coming in.
Hi, Daddy.
Daddy, this is me, sitting in the police station,
writing an application to allow me to go to jail.
When I end up in the cell, put my stuff there,
clean the teeth then I will call you back.
- Why they are not locked up? - Stop this circus show, Gintaras.
I am not from circus. These two are acrobats of deadly tricks.
Why are you shitting your pants because of that daddy?
Some low level deputy of some unknown governor.
And this little piece of shit is...
Father of these little pieces of shit is...
Even bigger piece of shit. And don’t tell me they are calling you?
I am listening.
Yes.
No.
Yes.
Of course
I understand. I understand.
You two...
Get your asses out of here.
And you two, together with your kettle.
Gintaras.
This is not your business, so stop being nosy.
This is my business.
Once I stopped being nosy.
We both stopped. Remember?
I do.
And you forgot where you live?
This is fucked up Lithuania.
It is you who is fucked up, not Lithuania.
And me as well.
Algis, let’s go.
Aren’t you ashamed?
Ashamed, ashamed.
- Hi. - Hi.
- Well? - Well what?
- Will I make it on time? - Maybe.
When will we sail?
When Rokas will finish the repair. Should be soon.
Works like a bee. One, two, and we are on the water.
- And where is our little bee now? - Flew away, to pick up same honey.
Ok.
Maybe, maybe, maybe...
Maybe?
Maybe...
Maybe... you should come to have dinner with us?
I will make Morocco chicken stew.
I will not ask second time.
Algis, let’s go.
Smells good.
Mud?
- Cabbages. - Acidified.
Stewed with flatfish.
And shrimps, baked on butter. With salt and salads.
Stop it. Either you stop this, or I will bite your ear off.
Do not pick up.
Ok, ok. Bite my ear off.
While you eat it, I will talk.
Hello.
It hurts!
Who is calling?
- Who is calling? - Gintaras.
Who is Gintaras?
Father’s brother.
Father’s brothers are called uncles. Hello.
Good afternoon, this is Justė, Rokas’s receptionist.
He cannot talk now; I mean he cannot hear you because I bit his ear off.
When? With pleasure.
Bye.
I will not eat your ear; we will have dinner at you uncle Gintaras.
So here it is...
Quickly take all your fucking stuff...
And get out of here.
I do not want to see you anymore.
Any questions?
I have one.
Where is the money?
Stop, go check the fire instead.
...and then Mozambique, Zambia, South Africa... and Cape Horn.
Cape Horn is in another continent.
What another continent? In the same Southern hemisphere.
Šarūnas, I wanted to ask. Will you make it?
Me, of course. More important is for bicycle to make it.
Not bad bowl, what are you up to?
What, what, dinner. You are invited.
Thank you. What is the occasion?
What occasion? Occasion of good mood.
I am inviting the press and other important people.
What is this?
Your order - paintbrushes, paint...
Look, beer is on the table.
You took that sign from the bank? Seriously?
Tell me.
My dear, lovely woman.
Here is present for you.
And also an order.
Order?
Make Christmas tree, sometime soon, during these days.
These are your friends?
No, these are Rokas friends from Rokiškis.
Tiny came.
- Respect Tiny. - Hi.
Well, so what are the problems?
Energetic.
- Hi, Tiny. - Hello.
Ran out of fuel?
Our money was stolen.
- Money. - It happens.
- Diesel? - Petrol.
Rokas, go to garage and bring canister. Give people some petrol.
- Have you eaten? - No.
So join us.
Algis!
Gabija, don’t worry about the paint.
Algis, what are you painting here?
Rock’n’roll dog for Justė.
Here you go, rock’n’roll dog.
Money to the kettle.
Let me be boring, what is this money?
Depends how you look at it.
Exactly, you will not go far without the money. It is boring too, but it is a fact.
- How much do you need? - A lot.
Need it for jib. Remember how much jib costs? Or did you forget?
For main sail... overall twenty thousand.
It is not so much.
Rich?
Have enough.
Maybe you spare some?
Maybe.
I am sorry.
Tell me my friend,
how is Skirma doing in the States?
Bad, Skirma in the States is doing badly. Why do you care?
Why are you so angry?
I am angry and that is it. Just like that.
- Want an honest answer? - Yes.
How long will you rub yourself in this garden?
Taking your ass from the couch to the hammock and back.
Sticking you face to German’s ass.
Stop acting like it is “Crime and Punishment”.
Blaming yourself. What was, what was not, what could happen or could not happen?
Who is responsible or not responsible?
Gintaras, I am telling you honestly, stop farting to an armchair.
Are you finished?
Finished.
Guys, what if Audrius be here? What he would tell you? What do you think?
Is it your birthday today?
Algis, you know, probably yes.
Thank you.
Here it is, Woodstock is starting!
Get up!
Woodstock!
What is going on here?
Rokas, what is going on here?
Madam, please.
The journey around Cape Horn is starting.
Fellas, your fee.
Hand made, by myself.
Oh shit!
Gintaras, all your stew got burned here.
Don’t worry, it is hot in Morocco.
We dedicate this blues to my friend Žilvinas and lovely notary.
I am telling you, something is going on with Gintaras. He is not ok.
It was summer,
flowers were blooming.
Strawberries were mellowing, wheat was ripening!
Justė, Rokas, Algis... come on!
Listen, seriously, where is Algis?
Have you seen Algis?
Algis!
Gintaras, stop it. Has anyone seen Algis?
Algis!
- Gabija! - Algis!
Algis!
Gabija!
Algis!
Any sober people here?
I am sober, but I do not have driver’s license.
Do you know how to drive?
- Yes. - So let’s go, quickly.
So you think you do not need to pick up the phone when boss calls you?
Listen, put on your pants and come here.
Probably to the harbor. Quickly, quickly!
So here it is.
I love you.
Good decision.
Hi, Rokas.
That asshole, took the yacht!
Asshole, asshole! Shit!
Asshole! Shit!
- Who? - Your nephew.
So he will sail a little and come back.
Come back? Do you know who owns that yacht?
Listen, call Žiufas.
Until Žiufas comes, our yacht will be taken by Russian border guards.
Guys, listen, we need some help here.
Some help.
Gintaras nephew sailed with the yacht. Few hundred meters away.
Žilvinas, why are you sitting here? Let’s go!
Shit, shit!
Asshole.
You first.
Meaning?
Same meaning.
Hard life of pirates...
Hello guys.
Family reunion?
Respect.
I see we have some guests.
Bring me the barrel.
Easy, easy.
Scram, old man.
Listen, my child, put away that gas gun.
Do you have a dog?
Fucking what?
8... 614...
199... 33
Ok, Martynas, passing through, passing through.
And now stop here. Edvardas Žaltys...
Go on you morons, faster.
We will go to the prom.
You will have stories to tell to your children and grandchildren
This is not Martynas, this is Gintaras from Nida.
I have bad news for you, Alfonsas.
You will have to come to Nida, to pick up your garbage.
The end.
Giedrė, pick up, pick up.
Listen, I don’t know...
Do not ask anything, just do what I’m telling you.
I own you 100 eels.
So boys, here is piece of paper, pen.
Start writing.
Me, Martynas Museikis
and Edvardas Žaltys...
What is happening here?
Nothing.
Where is Gintaras?
He left.
Where?
To notary.
Get in the car.
Quickly, quickly.
...being in clear consciousness and with clear mind...
What I am very doubtful of.
...I admit...
...that I am social garbage...
...and I ask...
Hello, Giedrė.
Hello, Žvinakevičius.
Why so early?
Why are you laughing?
I haven’t seen such circus in my life, Žvinakevičius.
So hello, bastards.
Hello, hello.
What are doing here?
Here?
Order. Instead of you.
I have a feeling you make such a mess for me,
that I will have to smoke fish for the rest of my life.
I smoke, and it is tasty.
- Are you Gintaras? - Not Gintaras, but Mr. Gintaras.
I am Gintaras.
Where is Martynas?
Now we will play a game, Mr. Museikis.
It is called “Daddy is looking for his son”.
Here is the key, not golden.
And over there, there are trash containers.
Time is ticking.
Fucking shit.
I feel I will puke soon.
Just try, you fucking cocksucker.
Puke into your own pocket.
Where is your old pensioner from Vilnius? Coming here on foot?
I am sorry Mr. Alfonsas.
Hi, dad.
What is going on here?
Mr. Alfonsas. I want to show you something.
Show him his toy.
Show me now.
Real one?
Of-fucking-course.
What are you thinking?
I will show it to the experts.
They will check the numbers.
You will be fucking checked yourself now.
How are you doing, dirty bastards?
I am listening very carefully.
Into the car.
Not this one.
What?
Not into this car.
Youngsters will come with me.
Just you wait...
This is not over...
Let’s go!
Why do you need this axe?
Why axe? You will see it yourself, soon.
Rokas, maybe you should go to Kristupas.
Total idiot.
Why are you staring like that every time?
Go home.
Are you ok?
How are you?
Fine.
Fine, you see, girls are jumping around.
I envy you.
And you?
Nothing.
We are thinking to go home, as our money are stolen.
Is this the boat that is lacking of everything?
- Yes. - Ok.
Excuse me.
You little bastard!
If it wasn’t me, you would not see this money at all.
Your lottery ticket was lucky one, so this is your money.
Maybe it is not enough to fix all the ship,
but at least for that main sail should be enough.
This is your share.
Thank you.
Let’s go home, I missed my mommy a lot.
What?
I didn’t get laid, so at least I bought a sail.
Get in, let’s go home.
Well?
Merry Christmas!
Look at calendar. What day is it today?
July 25th. So what?
Christmas has been moved to July 25th.
- Who moved? - Me.
Remember, what I told you in the bar?
Well...
Merry...
...Christmas everyone!
- Hi, Gabija. - Hello.
Going around the world?
Yes, finally.
Good luck. When are you coming back?
I don’t know.
So unexpected from the very first step...
I just wanted...